Understanding Your Internal Deceiver

move forward with spiritual counseling & coachingAs the year moves forward and time continues to shrink, more challenging situations seem to be coming our way, bringing many of us to the point of serious physical issues or emotional turmoil, confusion, and depression.

It is as if we are experiencing the true density of 3rd dimension for the first time, and we are forced to take a good look at our physical bodies, their needs, and the reality we’re creating on a daily basis.

There are brighter times ahead, we just need to continue forward without listening to what I call our internal deceiver. As Einstein put it, “Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving.” It is a matter of understanding that 3rd-dimensional reality is an illusion we are leaving behind and that we are being pushed through the density—with its physical and emotional hell—to be able to do so. Let me explain.

Everything you experience comes from your perception. There is nothing you see and believe as real that does not come from the projection of your own mind. If you stand up and turn around, right where you are, you’ll see what I mean: absolutely everything you perceive arises from your standpoint, and you cannot perceive anything from a different perspective. The same applies to your whole life—it occurs from the projection of consciousness through your mind and you cannot perceive it exactly like anyone else.

Your Life Is Your Spiritual Movie

You are a little piece of the Divine, an “encapsulated” soul with the illusion of individuality, and as an extension of this Infinite Consciousness Continuum, you have the creative potential to crystallize consciousness into matter. Just think for a minute: everything that was ever created came from someone’s idea, dream, or imagination. In truth, it was already there, as part of the Infinite Consciousness Continuum, but it manifested through the creative mind of an individual. It appears to be real and tangible because we all share the same mind and creative potential (our collective unconscious).

It is, however, not solid; everything we see is just an electromagnetic vibration, particles of light vibrating at different frequencies to create shapes and colors. It’s similar to the projection of a movie on a screen. The movie may seem very real and material (3-dimensional), but it is just light projected and filtered through a series of still images that were previously recorded or impressed onto a film.

Your life is also like a movie, except that the light (consciousness) is projected through the still images formed by the past impressions and experiences accumulated in your mental field. It is the ego-mind that colors your present perception with past impressions and makes you believe that they are real. It holds you in that illusion to keep you “safe” within the mind frame of what is familiar—from your upbringing and environment as a kid; from the defense mechanisms you created to belong (to family, community, culture, etc.); or the habits and addictions you acquired for emotional safety or comfort. Our greatest addiction is to our thoughts and beliefs.

As 3rd dimensional density is dissolving and we move into a higher level of consciousness, the ego-mind perceives this shift as a form of death, not only because we’re transitioning through 4th dimension (which up until now we’ve perceived as death), but also because letting go of what is familiar and makes us feel like individuals (or individual egos) is threatening. If I am not this false “I-sense” that I have always believed to be, then what am I, right? If I have to let go of it to shift into higher consciousness, that means “I” am dying—the ego-mind that I have identified with is, anyway. This is the great deceiver that has held us back and continues to drag us into self-doubt, fear, despair, and depression every step of the way.

Why Would I Deceive Myself?

This false “I-sense” is a deceiver because you are not your ego-mind, you are not your physical body, and you are not the self-image you have created to function in a dysfunctional world—as a man or woman, parent, spouse, professional, partner, etc. Yet it is this sense of individuality that allows you to experience the world in your own unique way and express who you are: your experiences, your dreams and desires, and your individual qualities and features.

It’s a tricky situation because you are and yet you are not who you think you are, and discriminating between what’s real and what’s false is difficult, especially if you try to do it on your own. Your ego-mind has been ruling your life all along and does not give up its control easily; plus, it knows you better than you and creates blind spots to prevent you from acknowledging the truth and stepping up to a truer sense of self to thrive.

So your ego-mind continuously tries to hold you back from accomplishing your dreams and fulfilling your purpose because it wants you fixated to the complex yet distorted self-image that you created while growing up: the one that makes you feel afraid, insecure, vulnerable, unworthy, unloved, or responsible, self-sacrificing, invisible, and so on. It wants you to remain in the past, trapped in the familiar “safety” of that self-image, and this is why it is a deceiver.

It makes you believe that what you think and feel are current thoughts and feelings when in reality they arise from still images in your past—impressions from past experiences, interpretations of your reality as a kid, the invisible language of your upbringing, and the memories that made you shape a reality that would continue reinforcing and creating more of the same. How can you be an assertive, confident, thriving adult when you internally still perceive things like a kid?

You are, however, a complex being with a divine spark and creative potential, able to perceive and express who you are in a unique manner—in a way that nobody else in the Universe can—and you are also capable of transcending the illusion of 3rd and 4th dimensions to step up into your true nature and inner power. Whatever is going on in your life right now is urgently prompting you to embrace your light, your power, and your purpose.

This can only be done by dropping all the emotional baggage (and its manifestations in the physical body) that holds you back and binds you to the past. In other words, it’s time to face and let go of your deceiver and start co-creating the reality you truly desire, even if it means being in an uncomfortable place for a while. It is time to release the illusion of safety and allow yourself to live on the edge of a new world—one that reflects a truer perception of yourself and a better future for the planet.

Trust that you are guided, that everything is going to be ok, and develop radical faith. In truth, this is the only thing to hold on to that is real right now. Once you have the courage to remove your blind spots, let go of the past, and move forward to keep your balance, the light, joy, and abundance of life can be yours. So keep on riding!

Contact me to receive compassionate guidance and support in these times of spiritual awakening and rebirth. I’d be more than happy to help you see what you cannot see. This is the time to invest in yourself and create the future you truly want and deserve!

© 2012 Yol Swan. All rights reserved.

  6 comments for “Understanding Your Internal Deceiver

  1. Sue
    08/21/2012 at 10:31 AM

    What a lovely article! Thank you for writing it.

    • 08/21/2012 at 10:43 AM

      Thank you so much for your comment. I’m glad you liked it.



  2. Christie
    08/23/2012 at 5:32 AM

    Hi Yol,

    why is it like we are experiencing the true density of the 3-d for the first time, as you put it? i was so excited that you brought this up bc ive noticed this too and wondered what are the underlying patterns behind this. is it bc some of us have entered the part of our clearing in which we are dealing with deeper survival, death, and pain wounds/ illusions? in the last few months i felt myself much more present in 3-d, whereas for the last 10 yrs of my life, i was not. i was riding the highs and lows of the other dimensions, transmuting, and anchoring light to the planet; and it was extremely rigorous and very physically difficult. and then i was surprised to all of a sudden find myself in 3-d energies. it has more dull, more slow, and depressing to have more of my attention here. i am having much less mystical experiences, feelings of joy and magic, n learning in general. at least im getting a break, can take things slower, and being balanced energetically is easier. are we going to merge the two anytime soon? i really thought that, i would not ground until the new world energies were more fully here. but i guess it was time for me to come down. maybe, i am clearing my density in my lower chakras so that i can experience the newer energies in these areas. can you say a little about what has been happening with this? im glad someone brought this up bc i definitely felt a difference lately and wondered if it was just me. thanks :)

    • 08/23/2012 at 10:33 AM


      Thank you for your comment. I love your question! What’s happening is that 3rd and 4th dimensions are merging together to get us into 5th, and this feels like being dead (4th) and alive (3rd) at the same time, especially to the ego, which is our false sense of self as individuals. Because of this, many of us are going through serious physical and/or emotional turmoil, being forced to look at aspects of ourselves that we were not aware of. It is as if density became denser and heavier to help us look at the wounds that we carry around and the world we have created as a result. (You might want to read another one of my articles: .)

      We are indeed dealing with deep wounds at this time because we cannot shift our consciousness to 5th dimension carrying so much emotional/physical baggage. The ego needs to be purified, and that’s where all the wounds are. Up until now, we could simply shove everything under the rug, so to speak, and go on with our lives pretending that all our repressed feelings and dismissed dreams weren’t there, but that is no longer possible. Now we have to face up to the truth and question who we are and what we truly want.

      At the same time, if we want to keep our physical body as we shift to 5th dimension, then we need to really start taking good care of it as well–without being overly identified with it, as has been the case so far. All this may be challenging and painful now, but it’s all for the better. Even those who have been buffering their emotions with alcohol or other drugs, including anti-depressants and such, are feeling it. There’s nowhere to hide! ;-)

      A big difference here is that we don’t have to look as long into what’s blocking our energy as before, because the feminine energy flow that is bringing all this to the surface (our subconscious) allows us to let go of what no longer serves us and move on. So there is no need to spend years in psychotherapy to overcome trauma or get to know yourself, especially if you have a spiritual understanding of what is going on in your life. Awareness is heightened and therefore the process is quicker. It is actually speeding up as time, which is a 3rd dimensional mental creation, dissolves.

      Yet maintaining a physical body also requires a practical approach to life in terms of making conscious choices as to what we feed ourselves with (physically, emotionally, visually, etc.) and how we deal with body issues and our environment. Again, our well-known “quick-fix band-aid” type of solutions no longer work, although those who want to remain in control of the masses are pushing the poisoning (drugs, fear, GMOs, etc.) even harder than before.

      Shifting into 5th dimension is a process that cannot be accomplished overnight, so it’s still going to take some time (a few years) to be fully experienced globally, but of course individual experience still prevails, since we each create our reality through our perception. So the process will be easier or harder depending on how much inner work one has done and how deeply one is willing to look within. It’s time to truly integrate the physical (lower chakras) with the spiritual (upper chakras) and heal our relationship with ourselves and the world.

      There are brighter times ahead, so hold on to the vision of what you want in your life, and allow the consciousness flow to take you where you need to go (to learn, to heal, to grow), with an open heart and the curiosity of a child!

      Hope this helps.



      • Christie
        09/03/2012 at 7:54 AM

        ~ Yol ~

        thanks so much for your response (sorry for my slowness to send a thanks back to you.. no internet for a while)… thank you for being a beautiful beacon who holds the knowing that we are making a big shift, and that there is nothing to fear :) i have recently found your website, yay!

        the things you have brought up are very on-point with what’s been happening for me! it makes me think of so much, actually… and i wanna share since some of your readers might relate to what ive been thinking/ feeling lately… its so true that before, id have many low points of emotional clearing, but i could keep going without having to face many of the more physical aspects of my life, or the deepest traumas still inside of me. all of that changed a few months ago, and i really had to step up my warrior aspects and put them to use in the physical, meaning i had to confront some people who were trying to oppress me for all these years of my life. it’s never had to be this “head on” before. but, now that this period of immense clearing of facing my deepest fears is drawing to a close (it was the things i was ever MOST resistant to ever experiencing); i feel so much lighter and like im not afraid of anything. as if, i can walk around as the real me, and not be afraid that the same traumas will occur to me ever again. if they occurred to me again, the emotional charge is gone and i would not be “hurt”. But, i have a strong sense that i will never have to go through those traumas again, because they have served their purpose and i can now depart from them forever. i feel so free within myself, that i can walk around like a crazy maniac if i wanted to, and not care at all what someone would think or if someone might be “mad at me” for not acting “normal”– which is probably the biggest wound that was at the bottom of it all! a lot of what i cleared last year was losing attachment to any sort of “spiritual identity”. meaning, i had to rely on my own senses completely and stop fitting them into what “seemed” spiritual. hard for us, since we have loved the spiritual, and ancient knowledge, for lifetimes (as we are the ones who created them!– i see it as, we created these wormholes to the divine, with ways of life, like yoga and meditation, etc, and now it’s much more about “embodying”– of course, even tho we can still love our knowledge of ancient mysticism). but i kept being forced to “directly sense” EVERYTHING and not think about what is “spiritual” and what is not. that was the last phase, before this current one, that gave me a lot of freedom and “range of motion” in my life. now that this phase is closing, it feels like a deepening of the previous one. i had to get to the point where someone saying, “that’s not what a good person does” would not affect me. for example, my father was abusive since i was a child, and he stopped when i was in high school. but was still very toxic and rageful afterward. he still had a hold on me, up until this last phase, bc there were things i couldn’t say, do, or express without him getting angry/ disapproving. it became so stifling, that the only thing left to do was for me to express violence to him for him to stop stifling me and leave my personal space. before i would have felt too bad of a person to do this. now i know, there is no “charge” to violence, or to anything at all. i don’t mean that using violence is the preferred method here, lol, but i had to be at the point where i could approve of myself even if i was violent. again, not that i want to continually use violence, but i had to come to see that someone’s opinion of it should not interfere with me using it. if anyone’s opinion has a hold on me, on however small of a thing it might be, that is where im not free. so now, it doesn’t have any hold on me, if my dad tells me im too violent or whatever he (or anyone) wants to say. so now i feel as free and clear as a whistle, almost like i have a lot of air flowing through my energy field :) i think what many of us fear is that, if we don’t have the spiritual stuff to guide us, or something in general to “keep us in line”, we will become “bad” or lose our way (what i see as religious conditioning that we were all susceptible to, as soon as we stepped into this “earth game”)… but in truth, what is left is only good. because we ARE what is good… we are light and love and we are clearing away all that is not, so what is left is beautiful, bright, all-love; it’s definitely not a sinner that is left under it all. even before we are done clearing, there is no “bad person”. that was just an illusion created by the dark agenda on the planet. so we don’t need to worry about “being a good person” bc that’s what we already have been all along. we don’t need to worry about not having something to sustain our “goodness” such as rituals or keeping up on the latest info, or whatever, bc we are the very definition of “sustenance of goodness” as that’s where we came from; and what we are at our core. it’s only all this conditioning on earth, that made it very believable that you need this or that, to be good or worthy. we don’t need anything at all. period. :) i feel waves of my own light of “goodness” coursing through me as i type this, as if to affirm it to myself! if we completely let go and be exactly as we feel, we were made to believe that something “wrong” might happen, but no, what is left is that the beauty of our real self can shine through when we let go. even while we are clearing and feeling negative!!! that’s why i think honesty and authenticity, has always appeared so beautiful to me, and i continually went to it like a “moth to a flame” :)

        a few more points i wanna say, yes on the need to pay attn to physical needs is very on cue for me right now. very big internal messages on that lately, and i am about to re-focus on diet and exercise. now that im “lighter” in my energy, it will be much easier to just naturally do these habits, is what my intuition is suggesting. i also hear myself saying, that, expecting love and abundance from my external environments, and being in the knowing that this is what i deserve, will help me to care for my body much better. because it will put me in a space of surrender and ease, and i can actually do what my body wants with that internal space available to me when i choose to see that all is well. another thing you mentioned about it being easier to clear ourselves now; it’s much easier to course myself through all these blows of clearing, and much easier to see into the illusion that held the wounds in place with each “episode” that i go through. im just glad that i came out on the other side of this last phase, because i never had to get my hands this dirty before. what’s next i wonder… :) thanks again Yol. im so glad that we of the first wave of consciousness are slowly coming together and finding solace and inspiration with each other :)

        • 09/03/2012 at 10:33 AM

          Hi Christie,

          Thanks for sharing your process. These are indeed powerful times to clear our wounds. Life happens in cycles, however, both big and small, and we are pushed to revisit our wounds at every cycle to see where we stand and how we stand. If some healing has taken place, then we can move onto the next level, but we will come face to face with the wound again at a higher level, and so on. This is how we evolve (or maybe I should say involve) back to the Self. For instance, October will bring a new “small” cycle to help us look into our wounds from a different angle.

          I think that it is absolutely necessary to accept our emotions about everything and break free from the self-images we have created to feel “safe” and “acceptable.” But it is out of those feelings that we discover who we truly are. So it is not just about acknowledging that we feel anger or hatred or fear, that is just the first step; then we need to take action in the direction that we choose, to move beyond the anger, hatred or fear. It’s not the people that we have those feelings toward that hold us back, but the feelings themselves—and our beliefs and interpretations of life. So it’s important to see and accept that they’re there, but then it’s crucial to let them go and move on to something more positive and in tune with who we truly are: love, forgiveness, and detachment are the true healers.

          I wish you all the best on your healing journey!



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