We all want a meaningful life, right? A life with purpose. And yet, most of us get confused about what that really means. Is it creating a happy family life, building a successful career, enjoying public recognition, or living a spiritual life?
It’s not surprising that we get puzzled about this, for we lose track of who we are and what we want from an early age. Between family and school, most of us are robbed of the innate desire to be self-directed.
We learn to wait for others to tell us how to behave, what to do, and how to do it. We attempt to recover our lost autonomy through the rebelliousness of adolescence, but by the time we’re adults it’s gotten so distorted that we’ve turned into emotionally codependent yet adamant ‘I-should-do-it-myself’ types.
Believe it or not, this internal contradiction keeps you stuck in your own stubbornness, frantically pedaling like a hamster on one of those little wheels, and trying to move forward unaware that the more aspects of yourself you leave behind, the less traction you’ll gain.
You want to express who you are and discover what you’re supposed to be doing, but you’ve learned to perceive and value yourself only through the judgment of others, especially those close to you now and in the past. Attempting to please them all, at least unconsciously, you’ve become your harshest judge—the inner bully I call your sense of otherness. Now you’re split between a self-image and your inner voice, and you keep waiting… for a sign, a green light, a nudge from life to get you going.
If you’re lucky, one day you get one or all of these, and you’re thrilled because you recognize your ‘calling.’ As soon as you start moving, however, you feel an invisible force that keeps holding you back.
You question your decisions.
You create obstacles or dramas that get in the way.
You stall your process and eventually stop.
Or you struggle to carry on until you get to a point where what you’re doing no longer feels like what you really wanted.
I yearned to discover my life purpose over the years. It was quite a driving force, so I studied many things, followed different paths, and built various businesses, all of which I thoroughly enjoyed, but the sense of inner dissatisfaction remained. Something more ‘permanent’ had yet to emerge from within. When my ex-husband left me, dragging me with him into bankruptcy before our divorce, I realized that life was pulling all the rugs from under me so I could see clearly where I stood on my own.
It was time for me to “walk my talk,” as they say, so I took all the life experiences I had accumulated—both positive and painful—to help me come out of the emotional quicksands I saw myself sinking into. I didn’t know back then that the Divine Feminine within had plans for me or that in that process, which felt like an eternity, I would discover the true meaning of my purpose.
Insight Comes When You Let Go of Your Resistance
When things fall apart, and you have nothing left to hold on to, what remains are your most precious assets. These are the spiritual forces within you that have been trying to guide and direct you all along, and your own resistance wouldn’t allow to come forth. They’ve been pointing at all the pieces of your soul puzzle, through your interactions with others and the things you do, to give you a clearer picture of your path and purpose.
Since some of those hold painful memories or weren’t valued by others, you’ve unconsciously denied them. This is why you’ve been left with an incomplete sense of self: you’re missing some of the pieces, which are the aspects you’ve been looking for outside of yourself—what you project and criticize or feel attracted to in others. These are things you must recognize and either transform or develop before you can become self-directed, which in truth means soul-guided.
You probably think that your purpose in life has to do with what you accomplish in the world. However, there are three different levels of purpose. I explore them in more detail in my upcoming book The Indigo Journals, but suffice it to say that these three levels may or may not be related. For instance, there are things you do on a daily basis that serve a purpose; your work may also fulfill a sense of purpose; and as you explore the issues and lessons you came to work on, then you get closer to accomplishing your soul purpose.
Each of these are performed from a different layer of your soul: either the physical, mental, emotional, or spiritual, which is the aspect you most probably perceive and live your whole life from. Now, when you are able to connect them all, then you’ll experience the incredible satisfaction of being aligned with your soul, which means you’ll become truly self-directed—guided from within in everything you do.
This is the best way to find direction and attain long-term fulfillment and peace of mind. If you would like to taste what this feels like, I invite you to get started with my individualized 7-week program: Discover Your Life Purpose. Each week you’ll get a deeper understanding of your life path, the ultimate meaning of your experience, and how to gain access to the spiritual forces within you—the ‘experts’ waiting to guide you every step of the way. Are you ready to make the leap to feel connected, clear, and self-directed? Then get on board today!
© 2015 Yol Swan. All rights reserved.