I navigated most of my life feeling like a stranger in a strange land. No matter where I lived or who I was with, I often had the inner sense of not belonging, of not quite fitting anywhere. It was not just the usual self-perception of being ‘wrong’ that this dysfunctional world instills in all of us while growing up; it was something deeper that pushed me to keep moving forward to find a place I could call home.
Perhaps you can relate on some level to this, especially if you’re an Indigo soul (or a soul type close to the Indigo archetype). I spent many years searching, exploring, traveling, and engaging with different people and groups for various reasons and interests, and yet it often led me to the same feeling—until all the rugs were pulled from under me and I had no choice but to embrace who I was without external validation or support.
My sister, my mother, and other relatives turned their back on me during senseless legal battles ensuing from an inheritance; my spiritual family pushed me out of the organization I had served for 12 years; my daughter’s father tore our family apart to go search for a more exciting relationship than I could offer. One by one, the structures and relationships I had relied on were fading away, and I had no control over what was happening.
This karmic unfolding was painful, but it also brought a much higher perspective on life. I had to ask myself, what was this really about, and why was I investing my love and self-worth in things and people who were so quick to leave me behind—and all for a false sense of being part of something? The grief of these losses allowed me to delve into the wounded Feminine within me and heal my self-perception to re-emerge empowered in who I was to become: a much freer version of myself!
The sense of not belonging anywhere that had haunted me for years turned into the possibility of belonging everywhere. I felt at home in my body and in myself. The ego-mind fixates on what’s missing or wrong, so when you surrender it to the spiritual forces within and around you, you discover that the pain and confusion it thrives on disappears, giving way to a stronger sense of inner connection that doesn’t rely on anything external.
As an immigrant, I know leaving your people and culture behind is not easy, but it can also open you up to new opportunities, because you must reinvent yourself in your new location. Similarly, becoming emotionally and spiritually free requires opening up to something beyond the usual self-perception, to transcend what traps you in the appearance of things or the illusions of the ego-mind.
In truth, finding your place in the Universe means finding yourself, by healing the past and embracing all of who you are, regardless of what others think, say, or judge in you. It’s not their perception you should be concerned about, in an attempt to gain some validation or a fleeting sense of fitting in; it’s how you perceive and treat yourself that really matters, because life is constant, often unpredictable change, and people come and go.
But you’re the most important person in your life. You’re the standpoint from which everything is projected into your life-movie and the person that experiences it. You’re the one making choices for the future and the soul that creates it. You’re the witness of your own doing and the spark of Consciousness expanding through your awareness and love.
Your true home is your heart. No matter where you are or who you are with, if you remain centered in yourself and anchored in the present, you’ll feel connected to the flow of life and love you’ve been seeking outside, through others. Trust me, I’ve been there, and I know nothing external can fill the gap your soul has been nudging you to heal with your true Self. So contact me today to embark on a journey of self-exploration and empowerment to navigate life with a higher, spiritual perception of who you really are!
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